Friday, December 24, 2004

Reality show from hell

I had a funny yet scary dream last night. I was a contestant in a reality show.

This time I have to survive the holiday camp from hell. The rule is you must survive (i.e. stay alive) the camp while solving a clue to get to the next round. The one that I was in was swarmed with poisonous snakes. It's funny because I could swear the camp was at my grandparent's house at that time. It turns out we all ran to the power house across the street because the snakes don't like the magnetic field surrounding it (??? is that even true???). Anyway, it was quite scary, I didn't sleep that well last night.

This is f***ing insane. Producers must stop churning out all these crappy reality shows. And they have so many quirky names for them. I found out that now they have The Search for the Ultimate Male Model. I guess it was just to beat America's Next Top Model. I bet you they were thinking, "Hey, if we can't beat them in terms of ratings, maybe we can beat them in having the longest title for a reality show award".

Star World is currently showing My Big Fat Obnoxious Fiance. That poor girl. She was crying on the first show. I hope Nia Vardalos would sue them for using her title.

I discovered this show, The Swan while looking for updates on For Love or Money couples (For all you suckers out there, Rachel and Caleb broke up! Ha ha she might as well take the money) Back to The Swan. This is one of those extreme reality show where the contestants are down-and-out women wanting to feel better about themselves. They will undergo training in beauty, poise, fitness, diet and provided a therapist to work on their self-esteem. In addition they will also get their face and body worked on courtesy of the show. Yep, they will get free plastic surgery with one catch, they won't be able to see themselves the whole 4 weeks. You got to see their before and after pictures for yourself. I swear to you they all turn out looking like drag queens. Honestly, I thought some of them contestants are pretty enough. They just need some make-up. For all the jerks that say they're not worthy should go to hell themselves.

I may have got this dream because I was bombarded with so many reality show ads yesterday. First I watched Amazing Race (no negative comments here I think this is the smartest reality show around. It's just the participants who are stupid). Then there's the ad for (drum roll please) The Search for the Ultimate Male Model which is constantly playing. Later on I saw this show with the tagline "What will the judges say?" I don't know what the hell that one's about and I don't care. But I will care when they began to invade my dreams, goddammit!

I know there's a lot more crazy, stupid shows that are much worse than this but we all have to get over this fixation on living through someone else's experience. I think it's a form of voyeurism. There's a market for this so they create them. To date the only reality show that I follow religously is The Amazing Race and I watch The Apprentice from time to time. I don't follow Survivor anymore and I catch For Love or Money's final episode only. Does that make me a better person? I sure hope so.

No comments: